Calm – Frantic Shanti

Advent 2025: Expectation vs. Reality

^{(Title image: Photo by Dayne Topkin on Unsplash)}

Or, “if at first you don’t succeed…”

I had planned out my Advent to incorporate a return to peace through mindfulness after a particularly difficult year. It wasn’t supposed to be overly involved or unattainable.

As a matter of fact, I figured it would be simple to slide back into staying more present, particularly since we are heading into one of my favorite times of the year. Hourly check-ins, more dedicated meditation time, a concerted effort at staying present all day long and avoiding anxious reactivity—oh, the blissful calm that would flood my life!

Hmmm, this did not go according to plan.
(Photo by Alan Rodriguez on Unsplash)

Instead, none of that happened. I was still running up until bedtime when I’d scramble to meditate. Continuously forgot to set an hourly reminder to return to mindfulness. Found myself being yanked around emotionally. And I didn’t even unpack any of the remaining moving boxes that are sitting around the new apartment.

An entire week of Advent was gone and I felt like I frittered it away. I was expecting to feel a bit more grounded by now, but I’m not even getting a decent night’s sleep.

So, I sat down to take a look at where I ran off the road. And truthfully, I was never even on one.

I stated my intention for Advent in last week’s post…and then aimlessly wandered off into the woods.

This is a good reminder that mindfulness doesn’t happen on its own, no matter how long you’ve been practicing it. By its very definition, it requires attention.

Funny, in order to practice mindfulness, you kinda need to be mindful about it.

This time, I had a brilliant idea: why not actually DO the thing that I planned to do?
(Photo: @FranticShanti)

Enough belly-aching. I brushed myself off, hiked up my pants and did the following: I set a timer. This could have been any sort of timer, but I used the Plum Village smartphone app’s “Bell of Mindfulness” timer, set to ring (well, “bong” actually) once every 20 minutes from 8am to 8am.

It’s a low, soulful tone that rumbles through whatever else I’m doing, while at the same time not sounding intrusive.

When I hear the “bong”, I take a deep breath and notice what that feels like. Quite often, that breath turns into a deep sigh and I realize that my breath before was shallower. So I take a few more deep breaths.

That type of diaphragmatic breathing, into the belly, activates the parasympathetic (“rest and digest”) nervous system, and thereby the relaxation response.

Then I go back to my work until I hear the next “bong” and this process repeats.

By mid-afternoon, I found that I was much more aware of my breath and was breathing deeper during the interval between the bonging. And that was just the first day.

Ahhhh, this was a much better plan than my previous “no-plan” plan. Yes, I was bummed that I hadn’t implemented an actual plan a week ago, but here I am now and it’s working well.

The best part is, you can’t really “fall behind” on being mindful. Unlike where I am with my Advent cheese calendar…

Favorite Calm Things: Kaiyukan Aquarium in Osaka

^{(Title image: Photo by Cristian Palmer on Unsplash)}

It’s been quite a week. And that means another post with some of my favorite ways to bring calm into my life…

This time around I’m posting about a video instead of a livestream. It’s a 12-hour long YouTube video of the central tank at the Osaka Aquarium Kaiyukan in Osaka, Japan, and it is glorious.

The central tank is a massively huge aquarium, showcasing marine animals from the Pacific Rim. According to the Kaiyukan Aquarium Wikipedia page, the tank is 34 meters (112 feet) long, 9 meters (30 feet) deep and has a staggering capacity of 5,400 cubic meters (190,699 cubic feet) of water. Its enormous size enables it to house an impressive range of animals, including whale sharks!

The central tank at Kaiyukan Aquarium in Osaka, Japan.

As long as you don’t have a fear of ocean scenes, the blueness of the water is very soothing. It feels nurturing and safe.

The soundtrack itself of the video is a little surprising: it’s disarmingly upbeat and I would not have expected it to have a calming effect…but give it a listen. I turn the volume down a bit while still allowing the tune to fill the space around me—excellent for focus as I’m working. Not distracting or sleep-inducing, just an effective noise blocker that helps with concentration.

Give this a view – I hope you enjoy it!

Favorite Calm Things: Between Two (Furry) Ears

^{(Title image: still photo captured from “Between2Ears” Twitch stream)}

I like finding some calming things to focus on when my brain is in overdrive. In my “Favorite Calm Things” series I’ve been mainly posting about streams on YouTube and Twitch.

Leyla, the star of Between2Ears.
(Photo from Twitch page)

So here’s another one that I adore! It’s called “Between2Ears” and chronicles walks in nature from the perspective of a dog named Leyla from Germany. The scenery is lovely, both the environment and Leyla’s soft and furry head. It’s one of those puppy heads that you’d love to sit and scratch.

These are not live streams, but they do run almost non-stop on Twitch (https://www.twitch.tv/between2ears) so there’s always something to watch…and it’s always daytime.

For those who aren’t interested in setting up a free Twitch account, there are also a number of videos of Leyla available on YouTube (https://www.youtube.com/@between2ears-virtualdogwal771/videos) featuring walks during different seasons of the year and in a variety of locations.

Leyla has a good camera set-up with an excellent gimbal that helps steady the image. There is a slight bounce to her step and while I don’t have any issues with it, check it out for yourself to see whether the movement is too much.

Watching the world between Leyla’s ears.
(Still photo captured from stream)

The stream and posted videos do a great job of recreating the experience of taking a curious puppy for a walk. Because the feed is recorded and slightly edited, you get the get good parts without mishaps or camera issues.

For me, as someone who adores dogs (and animals in general) but whose living situation currently prohibits me from having a pet of my own, this is such a sweet, calm way of experiencing the joy of a walk in nature with an inquisitive puppers. Until I’m in a place where I can again have a pet of my own, I can at least have this.

Hope you enjoy it too!

Naptime with Animal Friends: A Calming Visualization

^{(Title image: Photo by Kristin Lyse on Unsplash)}

I recently came up with a fun visualization for calming myself that I wanted to share with you. It’s ideal if you love animals.

The concept is quite simple. Imagine yourself in a comfortable place outdoors with an environment that is what you like best. As an example, for me, it’s a warm-ish spring or summer day and I’m sitting under an arbor covered in wisteria or another flowering vine with leaves just dense enough to allow dappled light through.

Create a detailed, colorful picture of your perfect place in your mind. And then…start settling. Bringing attention to your body, imagine what it would feel like to be there. As your breath slows, the calmness you generate travels outward and attracts friendly animals to you.

You are the Pied Piper of imaginary animals.
(Photo by Dmitry on Unsplash)

Perhaps a colorful bird alights on your shoulder or next to you. A bunny hops over and snuggles next to you. Or maybe you attract a group of sleepy cats that come, purring, and rub their faces against you before stretching out beside you and perhaps in your lap.

The animals can be whatever you desire. Maybe it’s a family of platypuses? Or perhaps you’re sitting by a natural pool, feet in the water, and koi are languidly swimming around you. Sometimes, I imagine something potentially frightening and powerful like a tiger appearing, then nuzzling my hair before he rolls onto the ground to snooze, pressed up to me.

It doesn’t have to be realistic. It just has to make you feel good. There are no rules.

All animals relax around you as long as you stay relaxed around them.
(Photo by Sandra Vasilenko on Unsplash)

The richer and more vibrant the picture, the more easily you will settle. As you develop the image in your mind, watching the butterflies circle around your head or feel the weight of the wolf’s head as she lays it on your shoulder, you nurture a sense of calm. These animals are attracted to you because you are what soothes them.

And the reason that you soothe them is because you have calmed yourself. Being calm, and tranferring that feeling to others, is your superpower.

If you lose focus and your mind drifts into worry or to-do lists, the animals will scatter, so you have to notice what’s happening and resume the visualization to show them that it’s safe to return. Allow a warm breeze against your skin or the cooing of mourning doves to transition you back to this calm space.

Understand that you have this ability to generate a sense of well-being, in yourself and others. You might not always be aware of it in the middle of a busy day…but it is there. Close your eyes, feel into your feet and call your favorite furry, feathered or scaly friend to you for a snuggle.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

If you’d rather not imagine animals, you can make flowers bloom or young children smile and nod off (which might be very satisfying if you are a preschool teacher!).

Favorite Calm Things: Chipmunks and Squirrels

^{(Title image: Photo by Raymond Eichelberger on Unsplash)}

Sometimes I need to shift my attention from the worries of the day and look at little fuzzy critters. One of my favorite outlets for this has become the Twitch stream @Chipmunks_and_Squirrels, on YouTube as @Chipmunksandsquirrels.

As the name suggests, this is a video stream of small woodland animals set in a lovely little backyard sanctuary built on the edge of a Connecticut forest. The audio is recorded at the same time as the video so you get a true sense of being in the woods, watching the little critters eat all the snackies put out for them.

It’s also touted as the perfect stream to leave on for your cats or dogs to keep them occupied. Sadly, I don’t have a pet to test this with, but it certainly serves as a soothing balm for me during a hectic work day! I often leave the stream on in the background as I’m working. It’s the perfect mix of nature sounds to be calming while not too distracting. And it provides a nice break to look at something other than spreadsheets.

Video of the activity from a live stream — “Chipmunks and Squirrels” streams live everyday on YouTube and Twitch.

The most frequent visitors tend to be gray and red squirrels and the high-definition camera focuses quickly to give beautiful closeups of them. But I’ve also seen an array of birds, including colorful bluejays and cardinals, and in the evening, curious raccoons. That’s just within the last couple of months.

Some of the squirrels I’ve seen often enough that I’ve been able to recognize them, including ones I’ve dubbed “Notch” (who has a notch in one ear) and “Slice” (who is missing the top of an ear). But there are quite a few others who come by.

And this is all in the cold of winter. I’m looking forward to warmer weather, longer days and the variety of creatures that spring and summer will bring. Should be lovely!

The YouTube channel (https://www.youtube.com/@Chipmunksandsquirrels) also offers a lot of video clips and shorts for those of us without a lot of time or attention span. Check it out and let me know what you think. 😀

Stop and Do This Now

^{(Title image: Photo by Ruslan Zh on Unsplash)}

No matter where you are reading this, pause now and take a deep breath.

And exhale.

How did that feel? How you were breathing right before you took that breath? Were you relaxed with deep breaths already? Or was your breathing quick and shallow and that sudden deep inhale felt very different?

For me, my breath is a reflection of my internal state. It’s a compass that points me to what is happening to me, regardless of what is going on around me. Many times, I’m not aware of how I am responding to things around me until I stop to notice my breathing.

And don’t forget to exhale.
(Photo by Kelly Jean on Unsplash)

Sometimes it takes a number of tries to achieve a deep inhale. Then I realize how shallow my breaths have been. That opens the door for me to consider how I’ve been reacting to things throughout the day. And it also leads to more deeper breaths as I settle down.

If I’m home, I may grab my flute — it is a Native American-style flute of red cedar wood. Holding it in my hands, enjoying the pleasant scent of cedar, playing a few bars of a mournful melody…all that helps to calm and ground me. It demands a controlled lungful of air for a clear tone, an elongated exhale that soothes me.

Did you take a deep breath at the start of this post? If not, try it now. And notice. Notice if it’s easy for your diaphragm to drop and pull in a good lungful of air, or does your body resist, as if something is squeezing your lungs, or your torso is bound tight?

Take several more breaths and allow them to expand your ribcage, coaxing more air in with every inhale and slowly releasing with every exhale. Until, like a balloon that has been stretched, the lungs fill fully, comfortably, easily.

And then just breathe. Allow yourself to stay where you are with whatever is taking place around you and keep breathing. Breathe mindfully for few minutes. Shake off the pressures of the day.

Then take one more deep breath…and carry on.

Staying Calm is the Best Revenge

^{(Title image: Image by Pexels from Pixabay)}

Yes, revenge is not a nice word. But if you’re having “that kind of a day” it just might offer you the kick in the pants that you need.

Here’s an example: last week was hectic for me. There were additional work demands on top of which popped up all sorts of fires that I needed to put out. Things were not going smoothly, I missed out on exercise, wasn’t sleeping well, got a letter of rent increase, had an upset stomach—all of which were dragging me into a funk.

With all the negative things coming at me, I lost my emotional footing.

So…I decided to take revenge on the bad news, work emergencies and everything else.

And I was going to do it by not letting it affect me. I even wrote “revenge” on a sticky note and put it up on my computer monitor (NOT at work! At home, where it’s easier to explain myself).

Just say “NO” to allowing the negatives in life to run you ragged. You show ’em!
(Photo by Jon Tyson on Unsplash)

Like I mentioned at the top of the post, revenge brings with it all sorts of negative connotations. It’s kind of like giving in to the “dark side” and using your anger, frustration, despair and whatnot to overcome you. I’m NOT advocating for that.

But there is a certain fire and focus that the concept of revenge embodies…yes, we can call it passion, but I’m not in the mood for that. So I’ll stick with simple revenge with the understanding that sometimes, little rebels that we are, we will do exactly the opposite of what the situations are drawing out of us. Just because.

Freak out? No, you bully, watch me remain calm. Heart starts racing? No no no, I soothe myself with deep breaths and extended exhales. Scary thoughts fluttering wildly in my head? Nope, I bring my attention down to my feet and seat, settling down into where I am now.

No temporary wrinkles are going to ruffle me. And I know that all these things are TEMPORARY. This might be fierce defiance that I’m dipping into, like a recalcitrant toddler, but if it works, it works.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

This is probably not what the great teachers of mindfulness had in mind…but, ehh, today I’m not playing nice.

Entering a Dimension of Calm

^{(Title image: Photo by Ksenia Makagonova on Unsplash)}

One of the amazing “side effects” of meditation for me has been that the calm I experience while I’m on my meditation cushion has been leaking into the rest of my life.

This did not happen overnight. As a matter of fact, it took a number of years (I am currently on 7+ years of daily meditation). But through the ups and downs of my sessions, there’s been a wonderful build-up of grounding and calm.

Yes, I still get smacked with a powerful wave of anxiety from time to time. But recovery is quicker and I don’t feel like I’m being dragged under, disoriented.

The raw dimension is slippery and loud and agitated.
(Photo by Martin Adams on Unsplash)

What I have been feeling lately is that there is a dimensionality to how I experience the world. It’s like this: there is the raw world, which has lots of hard edges and bright lights–overexposed, washed out colors–and loud noises. That’s the world I used to live in exclusively and it felt like a whoosh flying at me and pulling me in, allowing no control over what was hitting me, nor much of a way to steer myself.

But now, I’ve transcended that dimension somewhat. I’ve found a much more grounded dimension, perhaps a more soothing shade–think “golden hour”. The colors are deeper, the pace is slower, the sounds are gentler, the edges are softer. In this dimension, I find my roots quickly, feeling my feet on the floor and connection to the earth, to what is stable and unchanging.

The calm dimension invites deep breaths and beckons us into the present moment.
(Photo by Jasper Boer on Unsplash)

Here, I hear my breath and feel the tingle in my hands. I notice when I’m clenching my jaw, furrowing my brow, hunching my shoulders. I am also aware of when the raw dimension starts pushing to the forefront and am able to prioritize creating a safe space so that I don’t leave myself exposed.

This may sound very woo-woo but I assure you it’s not. It’s very much down-to-earth and sensible. There is no otherworldly magic at work. Just the understanding that my nervous system needs to feel safe and stable, and that I can offer myself a protective shield not by running away, but by settling into where I am.

It is as if there is a comfy blanket that I draw around myself, and from there I sit and watch and process and, if necessary, deflect the things around me. This is the gift that consistent meditation along with mindfulness have given me, and it feels like for the first time I’m experiencing life the way it was meant to be lived. Not as something to dodge and weave around but something to grow with.

“Just Listen”: A Simple Meditation

^{(Photo by Nick Fewings on Unsplash)}

Wow, 2024 is going by fast! We are now a quarter of the way done with the year and it feels like we just started.

In the midst of the whoosh of weeks flying by, here’s a way to slow things down and get intimate with the present moment. This is a simple little meditation but one that I find to be gloriously soothing.

I often do this in the morning when I awake, still stretched out comfortably in bed. Bringing attention to the weight of my body as it rests on the surface of the mattress. Sinking in.

We usually consider street traffic an annoyance, but it can translate into perfect sounds for a meditation.
(Photo by Derek Lee on Unsplash)

And for this meditation, instead of using the breath as a point of focus, I bring attention to the sounds around me. In my room, outside on the street.

There is a lot happening in this soundscape. We have a sound machine going, an air purifier whirring, cars are driving up and down the street below. The sound envelops me and I absorb myself in it. It feels comforting.

Initially, my attention is open, getting settled and taking everything in. Then I shift my focus from the various indoor sounds to the outdoor sounds, traveling around them one at a time, noticing each different one.

Gradually, I select one sound that I can distinguish and move my attention towards it. I get in close. And the closer I get to it, the more my focus turns to a certain aspect of that sound, a certain pitch or rhythm. And then I zoom in even more and try to stay there.

Inevitably, I’ll notice that my attention has been pulled away by thoughts or other sensations, and when I become aware of this, I gently return to that one aspect of that one sound. Exploration continues in this way until I decide to shift my focus to another sound and do the same thing.

There is beauty and peace in a simple meditation.
(Photo by Andriyko Podilnyk on Unsplash)

It’s a little dance between my thoughts and any given sound. Always returning to the sound.

There are no hard and fast rules to this. The option always exists to pull back from that one sound and open my awareness to everything audible around me. And perhaps instead of finding a specific sound to pour my attention into, I allow the soundscape as a whole to come to me and listen to it as if it were one unit, like a symphony.

This is meant to be uncomplicated and unforced. The idea is to stay present with the sounds around me and notice new textures and dimensions of noises.

I hope you give this a try the next time you find yourself in a perfect spot for it (whether in bed or outside under a tree in the park), and if you do, please let me know how it went!

Bringing Calm into Healing Spaces: Shushing the BEEP with Yoko Sen

^{Title image: Photo by Adhy Savala on Unsplash}

After I was diagnosed with cancer, one of the things I dreaded the most was having to spend time in the hospital. I’d broken my leg when I was 12 and the four days (and nights) that I was hospitalized were horrible. I was depressed and wanted to go home.

As a cancer patient, I wanted nothing to do with all the beeping and buzzing medical equipment. While all my treatments ended up being out-patient–which I was sooo happy about–I spent enough time in the vicinity of medical devices to hear my share of annoying beeps. In fact, that was the last thing I remember before losing consciousness before my surgery…and the first thing I heard when I awoke.

Last time I checked, BEEP BEEP BEEP was *not* a soothing sound.
(Photo by Richard Catabay on Unsplash)

Apparently, I’m not the only one who dislikes the incessant jarring noises of hospital equipment. I recently had the pleasure of attending a webinar with Yoko Sen of Sen Sound, an electronic music artist who has worked with hospitals and medical device manufacturers to address the issue of disruptive noises in an environment that’s supposed to be conducive to healing.

The whistles, beeps, buzzes and alarms are anything but.

Yoko spoke about the stress levels of both patients and medical staff as being affected negatively by this noise pollution. Patients cannot rest and recover. Caregivers are constantly on edge about what piece of equipment is alarming. This is not an insignificant problem as at least in one case, a death resulted from a healthcare worker shutting down a patient’s alarm by their bedside in an effort to make the surroundings more soothing for them, and mistakenly silenced their entire alarm system.

Staff speak of “alarm fatigue”, when everything’s constantly alarming that dire situations are missed among the cacophany that is the hospital situation. The sounds follow healthcare workers home, like echoes that never go away.

Yoko herself was hospitalized some years ago and described the onslaught of noises as terrifying. So as a musician, she set out to help hospitals reduce unnecessary noises and then make the necessary sounds more pleasant while still remaining informative.

The talk was excellent and interactive as she let the audience vote on the different “textures” of sounds. Interestingly, we discovered that past experiences can significantly color the way that we perceive a sound. Yoko’s entire talk was both entertaining and eye-opening. Unfortunately, I do not have a recording of this particular webinar that I can post, but below is one of the videos about her work.

Yoko Sen is bringing beautiful sounds into the healing environment.

I love that not only is a musician looking for ways to make the hospital experience more, well, hospitable for both the healthcare teams and patients, but also that hospitals and device manufacturers themselves identify the stress caused by all these noises as an issue to be addressed.

One of the complaints that’s often voiced about western medicine is that it focuses on disease rather than prevention, on sickness rather than healing. This is a great example of efforts being taken to change that.